Good Things

Tuesday, January 20, 2009
It was a good day on two counts. Peter finally arrived home (a day late and more than a dollar short having had to buy a new ticket from Joburg home). As a bonus, he was able to catch the earlier flight and was home by 13:30 instead of when we were expecting him at 18:00. Peter tagged along with me in the afternoon when I took the kids to afternoon activities at school, giving us an hour of uninterrupted time together. Once we were all home, we all fought for his attention! Peter brought gifts and greetings from friends at IBTS in Prague which was lovely. We are so thankful he is home!

The second good thing isn’t as good as Peter coming home but still ranks right up there. When I went grocery shopping this morning, none of the bakeries had any bread. This is difficult to understand, it being nearly 9:00 already. But that is the way it is sometimes. I asked the lady when she thought they would have bread and she guessed maybe half an hour. So I went across the road to DAPP (the second hand clothing store whose proceeds go to fight HIV/AIDS). I found a pair of navy blue crop pants that fit me perfectly, better than any other pants I have ever purchased. And here is the kicker: I got them for 3,000K which is about 60 cents. I was thrilled to say the least.

The only bad part of the day was when I partially snapped my big toenail in half trying to kill a cockroach escaping under my cupboards. Thankfully it wasn’t the same big toe that I lost in the encounter with the Jacuzzi cover two years ago, I taped it together with a bandaid and hopefully it will grow out without too much trouble.

Friday, January 23, 2009
It’s been a quiet week. Peter is sick of me saying that I am happy that he is home. But it is true.

MCC allows service workers two magazine subscriptions of their choice and recently we susbscribed to “Weavings” which is a journal for the Christian spiritual life. I’ve been thoroughly enjoying this latest issue that has the theme of the “dark night of the soul.” I wouldn’t say that I feel completely cut off from God but I feel I have to work harder here to nurture my spirituality. In one reflection, the author describes a windmill on the North Dakota farm where he grew up. If the wind was strong, it pushed the wheel into position so that it would turn at full power. But when there was only a gentle breeze, his father would climb the windmill and force the wheel to face the wind, then physically turn the fans until they caught the breeze and would turn on its own. I found this analogy helpful in understanding spiritual disciplines or devotions. The reason we engage in these spiritual activities is to position our lives to catch the “life-giving breath of God” as the author puts it. Sometimes we need to work a little harder to face the wind instead of hoping it will come on its own. The other night, I was telling Peter that I felt we “should” have someone over this weekend but it felt more like a burden and unnecessary. Peter asked why we try to have people over in the first place, why have we felt that was important in the past. He gently suggested that maybe we invite people to share meals with us to cultivate the discipline of hospitality, to keep ourselves open to the other, to be invitational. There are many ways to do that but sharing meals is one of the ways that we have found to do this. Sometimes I lose sight of “why” I do things and end up with feeling only the “should.” So friends have now been invited to join us on Sunday night and it isn’t because I “should” but because it is an opportunity to be hospitable.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Some requests for assistance are easier than others. This morning a stranger came to the door needing a variety of things, but bananas was one of them. So I gave him some bananas and a plastic bag so he could pick some mangos off our tree. But he wouldn’t leave my door and made a litany of other requests known to me. I reiterated that he could take a bagful of mangos. But his mother couldn’t eat mangos, he said. Goodness. Can anyone else eat them? Can you sell them? I finally had to just close the door because he wouldn’t leave.

Then this afternoon, Gideon, Brendan’s best friend here at MEF, told Jason he couldn’t go to school because his father didn’t have money. Jason was distraught. I went out to investigate and found out that Gideon couldn’t go back to school until his hair was cut (basically shaved since it is already very short). It broke my heart that his father didn’t have 5,000K ($1) for a haircut and therefore Gideon was barred from school. That was easily solved. I got out our hair clippers, set Gideon down in a chair, and started shaving his head. The other boys wanted to help so I handed off the task to them. You should have seen the smile on Gideon’s face. Sometimes helping is simple. Sometimes it is not.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009
We are into our second year of a three year term with MCC and though there are definitely frustrations and hard parts about living here, there are also many good things. Our first year was full of adjustments but we feel we have turned a corner and feel more settled and at home here. There are still many times where we miss the ease and comfort of life in North America as well as understanding the expectations in that context. But we also appreciate how this context encourages us to live simply, mindful of those around us who have so little. The boys' school, while not being academically rigorous, provides other opportunities such as learning French, computers, art, soccer and music. We have lots of time together as a family to play, read, and grow spiritually. Peter's work is meaningful, especially Africa Peacebuilding Institute, and he is now given the opportunity to do trainings in other countries which is excellent experience though tiring. I am finding ways to use my gifts here panono panono (little by little) as well. We have an excellent MCC Zambia team with Reps (bosses) that are encouraging, fun, and relaxed. We enjoy our house and living within the walls of MEF. We are hopeful that our connections with this community will continue to grow. Brendan and Jason say that they like living here. We recognize that living here has its own stressors for them but they seem to be thriving nonetheless.

And yet it is not easy to be away from North America. Brendan and Jason miss time with cousins and grandparents, as well as aunts and uncles. We miss out on special family events like weddings and funerals. We miss our church in Pasadena and the way it nurtured us spiritually. We miss friendships that are varied, deep, and plentiful. We miss being able to blend in and not be sought out because of being a white person. We miss high speed internet and the communication that enables, like phoning with Skype.

In the last few months, we have been discerning with Brendan and Jason, our families, and our Reps, whether or not we should choose to extend our term of service from three years to four years. There are a few reasons why we think extending may be beneficial, though they come with drawbacks as well. One reason to extend is that everything takes a lot of time here. Peter has ideas of how to strengthen the MEF Peace Center and continue to advance what MCC is trying to do in this area. At the same time, the pace of change can be frustratingly slow and the financial viability of MEF remains to be seen. But the work that Peter is doing is meaningful and that is exciting. I am just beginning to figure out how to use my gifts here and more time would be helpful to capitalized on that. Once you have done the hard work of adjusting, you might as well take advantage of it by staying a bit longer. Second, we are well taken care of by MCC. We live simply yet comfortably, and if we are frugal, are even able to put aside a bit for savings. Everyday we listen to the BBC World Service and hear about the global financial crisis. It seems foolish to toss aside a good, meaningful job with an organization we believe in, especially at this point in time. A third reason for extending is that Peter needs time to write and get articles published if he wants to land a position as a professor. An extra year could allow him to get more teaching experience, and articles published, so that he will be a stronger applicant when it comes to a job search in the future.

In agreeing to a four year term, after the second year, MCC will pay for a 60 day home leave for our family. It will be wonderful to have these two months of rest and relaxation, reconnecting with family, friends and church. However, returning to North America can also wreak havoc on our level of contentment here in Africa. As we connect with family and friends, and enjoy special outings not available here, and savor the abundant and delicious food, it may be harder to return to our lives in Kitwe. We are especially concerned about the boys' adjustment back to life here after having a great time in North America. (Maybe we could arrange for them to have a horrible two months and then they would be eager to return here!) However, as we are more and more settled here, it is also possible that they will be missing their friends, school, and lifestyle here and will transition better than we expect.

So after thinking and praying a lot, talking with others, and consulting with MCC, we have decided to extend our term by a year. If all goes according to plan, we will be in California in July and Washington State for a good part of August. We feel good about our decision to stay an extra year here, but at the same time, we know that it will continue to have its challenges. But you face challenges everywhere and we are getting used to the sorts of challenges we face here on a daily basis. They are familiar even if frustrating! Sometimes we wonder if what we do really makes a difference. But all we can do is live as faithfully as we can and pray that God will work in us and through us. We were encouraged yesterday when Peter had a conversation with Mr. Tubi, a fix-it man who works for a sister organization on the MEF campus. He told Peter that people were gossiping about us. Curious, Peter asked what people were saying. And Mr. Tubi said, “They are saying that you are different from other muzungus who have lived on our campus before. You let the Zambian children play in your yard and with your kids instead of chasing them away. You are different.” Glad to hear it wasn’t malicious gossip! I guess it just goes to show you that you never know what people see and how it impacts them. But it gave us a boost and encouraged us to keep going forward.