Sickness Galore!

Sunday, October 31, 2010

The power went off this morning at 11:00 and didn’t return until 6:00. That meant no fans to blow around the hot air. The boys and I escaped to Georgi’s for a swim, even though she wasn’t there. Peter was feeling wretched, as predicted. But he is on antibiotics so we hope that will help him recover.

Despite the heat, the boys have actually been getting along splendidly. They rediscovered the joys of UNO and played for two hours in the morning. We didn’t hear any complaints, even when the other laid down a “Draw 4,” and there were no tantrums by the loser of the game. This is a big improvement. Suddenly the boys are interested in other games too, like Ticket to Ride and Skipbo and Backgammon. That is fun for Peter and I as we were beginning to wonder if the “game gene” skipped a generation.

Brendan also rediscovered a latchhook project that he got when we lived in Prague, five years ago. In five years he has completed about 1/4 of the project. He just was not interested. Whenever he was bored, he was sure to hear me say, “You could work on your latchhook . . .” Today he discovered that it isn’t such a bad thing to work on after all. I told him that it has taken him five years to get this far but that in a few days, he could actually complete it. Then he could give it to me as a Christmas gift. He quipped back, “Or I could wait another five years to complete it and give it to my girlfriend!” I nearly died laughing. That kid cracks me up!

Monday, November 1, 2010

One of the things I hate most about African culture is the accepted promiscuity of men. Women ask me to find them white men for a husbands because it is generally believed that white men don’t cheat on their wives. When young brides are being prepared for marriage by the “matron,” they are taught that men have “needs” and if those needs are met elsewhere, you just have to accept that. Men are expected to receive sex on demand, whether with one’s wife or whomever they want. Having a “girlfriend” on the side is expected and men have to have money to lavish gifts on their girlfriends while the wife has to scrape enough money together for food and school fees. If these sexual demands are not met, it is common to beat your wife. While not all Zambian men are like this, obviously, it is the dominant definition of manhood at this time in this place. I’ve been reading a lot lately on issues of gender in preparation for the course I will be teaching on “Gender and Peacebuilding” in two weeks time. One area that I have found fascinating concerns manhood and “masculinities” (plural because there isn’t just one way of being a man). I have read some fascinating articles on manhood in Africa and it has shed some light on why many modern African men behave the way they do. In an article entitled, “Changing Gender Roles And Male Disempowerment In Rural And Urban East Africa: A Neglected Dimension In The Study Of Sexual And Reproductive Behaviour In East Africa,” the author, Margrethe Silberschmidt, writes:

“First, socioeconomic change in rural and urban Africa has increasingly disempowered men. Second, this has resulted in men’s lack of social value and self-esteem. Third, with unemployment and incapable of fulfilling social roles and expectations, male identity and self-esteem have increasingly become linked to sexuality and sexual manifestations. Fourth, in their frustrated situation, multi-partnered sexual relationships and sexually aggressive behaviour seem to have become essential to strengthen masculinity and self-esteem.”

This explanation doesn’t excuse men’s behavior but it puts it into context. I don’t know if I fully believe that this is just a recent phenomenon (one author says it has been since the 1980s), but it helps me not to paint African sexuality with such a broad stroke. It is still a problem and one that needs to be addressed but it helps to know a bit of the historical context and how this current version of masculinity came about.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

It is hot. Really hot. The rains will be coming soon. They have to. Or I might DIE!

We had forgotten how awesome it is to have ice to make your drink cold. I do have an ice tray but there is never room in my freezer for it so we never have ice. In this heat though, our fridge just can’t keep up and water coming out of it is not really all that cold (and other items turn moldy fast). But I managed to make room for the ice tray and we are loving it! Ah, the wonders of ice!

Monday, November 8, 2010

The good news: The rains have come! Hooray! It has only taken two good rains and things are already starting to look green. With the rain come the frequent power outages and no internet but even with that, the change is welcome.

The bad news: Brendan has malaria again, the third time in five weeks. Either he keeps getting reinfected, or more likely, the medicine isn’t finishing the job and it keeps coming back. He also continues to have stomach cramps and we don’t know what that is about. So I took him to Company Clinic to get a malaria test as well as a stool sample to see if he has giardia or something like that. The malaria test came back positive so that, at least, is confirmed. We chose to see the doctor, a beautiful young Indian lady who explains things very well and gives you the options. She said that the high cramps that Brendan has been complaining about, is often a symptom of malaria. Low cramps are associated with giardia. But we needed to wait until Tuesday morning to hear about the stool sample when the lab should call me with the results. In the meantime, Dr. Wilfred recommended that we start Brendan on daily injections to deal with the malaria. Since the other meds didn’t seem to stop the malaria from coming back, we thought this would be a good choice. Well, Brendan didn’t like the idea of getting shots but he was overruled. I had to go to the clinic’s pharmacy to purchase the five injections then take it to the nurse’s station. Brendan got the first “jab” as they call it here and was very brave. Every morning for the rest of the week, I need to take him back for the remaining shots. It is literally a “pain in the butt” for both of us but we want him to be healthy again.

Friday, November 12, 2010

I still hadn’t heard back on Brendan’s stool sample despite checking with the nurses on Thursday and Friday mornings during the injections. I was supposed to receive a call on Tuesday with the results but that didn’t happen for some reason and the nurses I asked couldn’t find anything in the file. So I stopped back later this morning to see if I could get some answers. I was asked to wait to see the doctor so I sat while every other possible person was seen, even those who came after me. I finally realized this was because I am not a member of the clinic but only a “cash” patient. At least we get good care for a fraction of the amount the members pay. It turns out that Brendan does not have giarida but has some other kind of parasite or bacteria like salmonella. I guess the cramping wasn’t just due to the malaria. Good to know. So now he is on more medication to deal with that.

While I was at the doctor, I mentioned that Peter still has a very sore throat even after a round of antibiotics. She told me there is a really bad infection going around that has to be treated aggressively. Best was for him to have a throat culture done so that the proper meds could be given to fight this thing. So as soon as I got home I sent Peter off to the clinic. Sure enough, he has a bad infection and he came home with more antibiotics.

I woke up with a sore throat and a heaviness in my chest. I am trying to stave off getting sick with lots of Airborne and EmergenC and rest. I am to teach my “Gender and Peacebuilding” intensive next week at MEF and it would really be horrible to be sick during that week. So I am praying that somehow this sickness will pass me by.